How To Get Better Results From a Conflict

January 06, 2017 2 Comments

How To Get Better Results From a Conflict

Do you feel you have effective communication skills? Do people really GET what you're saying? Does is often lead to conflict or perhaps you shutting down altogether? There's a better way, read on....;)

Effective conflict resolution is about approaching a potential disagreement with a genuine desire for resolution, rather than anger or avoidance.

Confronting an issue can make you feel vulnerable. You may expose yourself to rejection, you may be forced to admit that you have contributed to the problem, or it could challenge your own willingness to change.

The good news is that there is a simple and effective tools to turn disagreements into positive outcomes. It’s called ‘STEP into Conflict.’

S – ‘Seek to Understand.’ – To understand another person, we must be willing to be truly hear and empathize with their position. We must be willing to put our own perceptions and judgments aside and focus intently on their thoughts and feelings. Asking to be understood is a way of saying, "Open up your mind to me," and wanting to understand the other person is a way of saying, "I'll open my mind up for you."

T – ‘Then be Understood.’ – Once we understand, we can then seek to be understood. If we show true care and concern for the other person’s position, it is more likely that they will try to understand us. When both parties fully understand, they can work together to discover possible outcomes.

E – ‘Empathize with Others.’ - Ask questions and express interest in the other person by listening to their side of the situation without judgment. When we put ourselves in the other person’s shoes, they become less defensive and more open to collaboration because they feel they have been seen and heard.

P – ‘Problem Solve.’ – Find ways to solve problems by considering the needs of everyone involved. Brainstorm potential solutions to resolve theconflict in a way that satisfies all parties. Don’t get hooked into just three possibilities: your way, the other person’s way, or a bland compromise. Remain flexible and open-minded, and stay engaged and committed to the process until a solution is reached.”

Have you ever sensed that someone you are talking to is not on the same wavelength as you? That no matter how hard you try, they can’t or don’t want to get on the same page?

While this feels very frustrating and unproductive, you can get beyond it. With understanding, empathy and collaboration, people with differing perspectives can find common ground.

Enroll in the 'Mastering Life Harmony online course and downloadable workbook to help you resolve conflict in your life! Enroll by clicking here:​

2 Responses

Teolita  Singleton
Teolita Singleton

March 26, 2017

I truly appreciated the writing on how to get or how to take steps on getting better when it comes to conflict. I Ithought this was really productive ,so helpful thank you.


March 21, 2017

I really like what was said it will help me deal with my next relationship when having conflicts

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